The happy couple doesn’t have to know you’re a Scrooge.

The average American attends three weddings a year, forking over $127 on each wedding gift for a relative and $99 on each gift for a friend, according to data from American Express. Some people have had enough: One in five say they’ve declined a wedding invitation because of the expense of going, according to data released in April from Bankrate.com.

The good news: You don’t have to decline the invitation just because you can’t afford a gift. Experts say these are some of the ways you can spend next to nothing on a wedding gift without offending the couple.

Donate to charity — without anyone knowing the amount of the donation. Give a donation to a charity you think the couple will care about in their name as a gift, says Coupons.com’s savings expert Jeanette Pavini. In many cases, the charity will simply notify the couple that a donation has been given in their name — not how much the donation was for, she adds; call and ask if you’re unsure how it works.

Give your services. One of the best ways to give a great gift — without spending a dime — is to give the couple the gift of your services, says Pavini. Etiquette and relationships expert April Masini says graphic or visual artists can offer to make the invitations, photographers can take snaps at the big day; foodies can make the wedding cake. Other options that don’t require any special skill: Free babysitting in the coming months, watering the plants and picking up the mail during the couple’s honeymoon. “These gifts will cost you a nominal fee, but save a bride and groom hundreds to thousands — and will be a unique, personal gift that will never be forgotten the way a Tiffany’s vase will,” says Masini. Pavini says you should “make it cute — a gift certificate that entitles [the couple] to your services.”

Personalize something. Courtney Jespersen, a retail and shopping expert for NerdWallet.com, says that you can personalize something like a photo frame (she likes the site Personalization.com) by getting it engraved with say the wedding date or couple’s names. Pop in a photo of the couple and you’ve got a thoughtful gift that costs far less than something off the registry, she says. Other options for engraving and personalization: Glassware, cutting boards and paperweights.

Create a memory book or video. For $20 or less, you can create a “memory book” for the couple using photos you have taken or will take at their wedding — and asking other friends to send their snapshots too — and putting that together with thoughts, memories and quotes into a book, says Pavini. Shutterfly and Snapfish both let you build a book like this for around $20. Pavini adds that you can also, using just your cell phone, talk to guests at the wedding about their favorite memories with the couple and create a video using that footage for next to nothing.

Write out a journal. Buy a beautiful journal — these can cost as little as $10 — and fill it with love stories, poems and inspirational quotes you select, Pavini says. You can also get marital advice and thoughts from the couple’s friends and family and fill the book with that. “They’ll remember this more than any place setting.”

Go in on a group gift. Brianna McGurran, NerdWallet’s personal finance expert, says that if a big group goes in one something great — say an awesome experience for the couple during their honeymoon — you can spend as little as $20 apiece.

Make a recipe book. Collect favorite recipes from the couple’s friends and family and turn them into a nice recipe book for the couple, says Pavini. That the kind of gift a couple might love so much they pass it on to their children, she adds.

Make the gift. “Handmade gifts are incredibly thoughtful,” says Masini, including things like a homemade quilt or knitted pillows. If you’re an artist, paint or draw the couple; if you’re a gardener, buy a planter and fill it with fresh herbs and flowers or plant a tree in the couple’s yard in their honor.